Being Real
Recently I was with some people who were flattering me in an obnoxious way. A few minutes later I heard their “ask” as they were trying to close a sale of their initiative.
I really hate flattery. It is truly a form of manipulation.
While I am sure I have used flattery in the past, I am very aware of when I am tempted to use it.
Being real with people should be a goal of every leader.
Here is how you know when someone is for you or for themselves:
- When someone uses flattery on you, they are for themselves and their agenda.
- When someone desires to encourage you positively it is for you.
I encourage you to watch your motive when it comes to influencing people. Flattery is a lazy way to try to get what you want. Invest in the relationship and seek to impact people for their benefit and you will get what you need every time.
People respect real people. People run from fakes.
Posted on January 27, 2009 in Personal Growth
3 Comments
Chad Ousley said...
Great article, flattery is really an insult and a sign of contempt on those it is used on.
Comment by Chad Ousley - Jan 28, 2009 @ 05:57 PM
Steve said...
Great perspective Jeremie. I had a co-worker who liberally bantered flattery. It really bothered me, but I questioned myself and wondered why it bothered me so much. You nailed it - the flattery was being shared for an alternative agenda. She was not genuine, the traits she referenced was accurate. It was her motive that bothered me. Your blog helped bring this all into perspective.
Comment by Steve - Jan 29, 2009 @ 08:21 PM
OLUSOJI KEHINDE said...
If there is something in which i appreciate in people it is been real. there are no two way to it and for those who belives in fake they will not last. sooner than expected their inferiority character will blow them off
Comment by OLUSOJI KEHINDE - Feb 25, 2009 @ 02:50 PM